I meet you again. It is the night before the NYC Half. I am nervous and angry that I haven’t been able to make the progress I wanted. I keep doing stuff but not making significant progress.

I feel like I am battling the increase of entropy with these things; but not keeping the source of the increase in entropy in check. So, I just want to have a bit of a heart to heart.

Five years since COVID have gone by…. I have gotten older. I have improved some aspects of my life, but not others health wise. Many wasted attempts. Tried so many things. Constantly keep trying. But things are hard.

Of course, I am proud that I did the Marathon. But I am not satisfied yet. This is just the beginning. I have bigger goals for myself healthwise. I am thinking about the next 40 years. However, the next 40 years have to start with the next one.

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My why during the “Marathon Era” was clear – election + marathon. It was amazing. I am now in the “Rolex Era” and my why is also driven by performance. I am viewing myself so differently than before. I am viewing myself as an agile guy, a CEO, sharp Finance guy. Someone who will conquer the industry in the future (is conquering now). Extremely charasmatic. I just need the body and lifestyle to go with this. I like to watch Formula 1. I am a runner. I like speed, adventure. I want to be able to walk up flights of stairs easily. I want to be on the move always because this is part of being human. That’s what I never got before. Humans are meant to move every single day. It is the artifact of modern life that causes deviations from that.

Focus on Marathon 2026. Run an uninterrupted 5k. Lift weights. AND SHED WEIGHT. Let’s get to “Healthy” weight.

This is where I want to go. That’s it!

I also just want to do hard things. Physically hard. Races, runs, etc.

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So, here is some specific guidance:

• Live life on the front foot. Be confident that you will make the right choices
• Eat healthy but have fun
• Focus on uninterrupted running
• Gym once a week
• Take a walk for an hour during work hours during the week.

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Passage of time

Writing regularly is my mechanism to remain on track. I should keep doing it regularly. I am obsessed with this but I need to see results.

Look, more than 2 years have gone by since I started this blog. But it seems like it was just yesterday. I remember where I was when I restarted the block. And I remember what had just happened with my dad. So many things have happened since then. But it all feels so compressed.

The days are long, but the years are short the passage of time is crazy to me. Absolutely crazy.

So, I need to increase my mindfulness. I don’t want there to be a snap of my fingers and suddenly I am an obese 50 year old living a shitty life. FUCK NO. I AM NOT LETTING THAT HAPPEN>

Dr. Nicholas Fabiano summarizes a review from Elsevier highlighting coffee’s potential to preserve biological aging mechanisms. Over the past 20 years, studies have consistently shown that moderate coffee consumption reduces all-cause mortality by about 17%, potentially increasing healthspan by 1.8 years. Coffee appears to lower mortality risks related to cardiovascular, cerebrovascular, cancer, and respiratory diseases while also mitigating memory loss, depression, and frailty in aging individuals. Mechanistically, coffee contributes to genomic stability, metabolic regulation, and inflammation control, while enhancing stress adaptation. However, further research is needed to fully understand these anti-aging effects and their implications for longevity.

Coffee preserves the main biological mechanisms of aging.

🧵1/9 pic.twitter.com/lHE5BXEP8v

— Nicholas Fabiano, MD (@NTFabiano) March 14, 2025

tldr:

• Eating processed foods changes brain chemistry
• And it makes you eat 500 to a thousand more calories per day
• Changes body composition

Ultra-processed foods fundamentally disrupt our brain, cellular, and metabolic health.

They now make up nearly 60% of the average American’s diet and contribute to 90% of added sugar intake. Studies link them to hypertension, obesity, cancer—including breast cancer—and increased all-cause mortality.

Kevin Hall’s (
@KevinH_PhD
) research has shown that when people eat highly processed foods, they consume up to 500 more calories per day.

And the effects happen fast. A new study found that just 5 days on a high-calorie ultra-processed diet led to:

• A 63% increase in liver fat, despite no change in body weight.
• Altered insulin activity in the brain, impairing metabolism.
• Diminished reward sensitivity and reduced white matter integrity in regions controlling motivation, cognition, and impulse control.

The shocking part? These changes—resembling those of a brain from someone with obesity—persisted for up to a week after cutting out ultra-processed foods and returning to a regular diet.

Even in a group of healthy, normal-weight men, short-term overeating of calorie-dense but nutrient-poor snack foods profoundly changed brain behavior and metabolism. Imagine what years or decades of a poor diet can do.

Study DOI: 10.1038/s42255-025-01226-9

Ultra-processed foods fundamentally disrupt our brain, cellular, and metabolic health.

They now make up nearly 60% of the average American’s diet and contribute to 90% of added sugar intake. Studies link them to hypertension, obesity, cancer—including breast cancer—and increased… pic.twitter.com/LMrxDUHuqx

— Dr. Rhonda Patrick (@foundmyfitness) March 11, 2025

How does running in the heat change VO₂max and fuel utilization?

In a new study, researchers compared 10 trained runners and 10 inactive individuals as they performed incremental treadmill tests to exhaustion in two conditions:

• Temperate (18°C, 43% humidity)
• Hot (34°C, 42% humidity)

The researchers measured VO₂max to assess aerobic capacity, substrate oxidation (fat vs. carbohydrate use) to determine fuel utilization, core temperature and skin temperature to evaluate thermoregulation, and blood lactate levels to assess metabolic stress.

Key findings:

🔥VO₂max dropped by 13-15% in the heat: Both trained runners and inactive individuals showed significantly lower peak oxygen consumption in hot conditions.

🔥 Fat oxidation decreased and carbohydrate use increased: In hot conditions, the body switched from burning fat to burning carbohydrates faster. Carbohydrate oxidation was significantly higher in trained runners in the heat, but not in inactive individuals.

🔥 Blood lactate accumulation was higher in the heat: Lactate levels rose earlier and reached higher peak concentrations.

🔥 Trained runners experienced more heat stress than inactive individuals: Core temperatures were significantly higher in trained runners than in inactive individuals in the heat.

How does running in the heat change VO₂max and fuel utilization?

In a new study, researchers compared 10 trained runners and 10 inactive individuals as they performed incremental treadmill tests to exhaustion in two conditions:

– Temperate (18°C, 43% humidity)
– Hot (34°C, 42%… pic.twitter.com/R64WtZ012r

— Brady Holmer (@B_Holmer) March 11, 2025

Believe it or not, there is one thing that 99% of your fat loss results depend on. 

And it’s a bit of a hard pill to swallow. 

To help you understand, I need to take you back to 10 years ago, when I did a 10-day silent meditation retreat.

No talking. No reading. No writing. No eye contact.

You can’t touch anyone. Or do anything. 

Just meditating for 12 hours a day.

By day two, I was losing my mind.

Work. Women. Random thoughts.

My brain wouldn’t shut up.

I couldn’t focus, and I considered quitting.

But on day three, the instructor said something that changed everything:

“This is how meditation goes. You focus. Your mind wanders. You notice. You come back. That’s the practice.”

And it all made sense.

Learning that it was normal to slip up and fall off track made me realize that I wasn’t a failure. 

It was all just part of the process. 

The only way I could really lose was by giving up entirely. 

Same goes for losing fat.

You’ll be on track. Then life happens. 

A bad day. A bad week. A bad year.

The key?

Come back to the practice.

One meal. One walk. One workout.

Anything. 

That’s all it takes to be back on track.

No guilt. No beating yourself up. No waiting for Monday.

Just return to the practice. 

Again and again.

It’s a long term relationship, not a one night stand. 

• People shed weight
• People get jacked
• They work out often
• And they keep their calories low.
• Dont be depressed
• Legs feel great
• Breathing feels great
• The park is awesome
• Lifting weights are great.
• Lets keep going

• Dont be lax

Seriously. I am just eating a lot. The salads. The take outs. Holy shit, how can I eat so much? Im eating 3000 calories a day.

Cmon dude, be careful. Lets focus.

Remember the vacations. The portions, the simplicities.

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Eat better.

Be keto if youw ant

Dude, I have been undercounting my calories by a LOT. I mean A LOT. ChatGPT is a GODSEND

I looked at some of my regular LUNCH orders from a salad place

Your estimated calorie intake for this Just Salad order is 2,010 calories.

Breakdown:
Arugula → 20 calories
Roasted Sweet Potatoes → 150 calories
Garlic Butter Croutons → 150 calories
Sliced Carrots → 30 calories
Sliced Cucumbers → 10 calories
2X Oven Roasted Chicken → 600 calories
2X Crispy Chicken → 800 calories
Heavy Smoky Poblano Ranch (Mixed In) → 250 calories
The crispy chicken and heavy dressing alone make up over half the total calories. If you want to cut this down while keeping the flavor, dropping just one crispy chicken and lightening the dressing could save 500+ calories. Let me know how you want to tweak it next time! ​

What the actual fuck

Here is a nother one

Your estimated calorie intake for this Build Your Own Salad is 1,980 calories.

Breakdown:
Leafy Greens & Cilantro → 50 calories
Edamame → 120 calories
Garlic Butter Croutons → 150 calories
Cucumbers → 10 calories
2X Oven Roasted Chicken → 600 calories
2X Crispy Chicken → 800 calories
Heavy Smoky Poblano Ranch (Mixed In) → 250 calories
The crispy chicken and dressing are the biggest contributors here. Let me know if you want adjustments to fit your goals better! ​

Fucking wasted all this time.

My mindset gets better. And I see other people working on themselves, which makes me feel better.

The next day, my legs feel better. My breathing is better. I sleep better and faster. I am less anxious. This is therapy.

The sweet spot for me is 10km run/walk. This is the ultimate reset. I just have to mentally commit myself to 2 hours of effort.

Now I feel like going again.

SHIT I think I can do the half this weekend. LETS FUCKING GOOOO

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The mind works in strange ways. Well, at least my mind. ChatGPT tells me that I have hyperfocus and motivation irregulation adHd?.

I need to be mentally ready before I dive in. That’s what’s been holding me back. For instance, with in 2023 and 2024, I was mentally in. I had no questions. I had simplified what I was focussed on (running) and I dove in. The momentum was tremendous.

The question I have for you is that – do you want to (1) loose weight (2) fix your body’s vitals like BP, glucose, etc?

I dunno. It feels like so much work. Okay fine, I get it. What is my goal?

Marathon 2026. Is this an actual goal? Do you want to do this? I do.

I need some time to focus on other parts of the body besides the running load. Although cardio is important. I am so mentally stuck right now.

Like right now, I can’t stop thinking about the half marathon. I am not ready due to the Touching base and Injury injury. But I feel obligated to participate.

but let’s say you don’t participate – you shouldn’t get into a all or nothing mentality either. doesnt mean you sit at home and do nothing.

Fuck man. I am confused. Mentally stuck. What should I do? i am going to give myself time.

I just want to go to the park and enjoy. Ultimately thats what I want to do. I want to enjoy the gym. and not overly perspective.

Okay, done. Lets reduce the pressure and focus on enjoyment for now.